Flower Girls and Ring Bearers


While not a required part of a wedding, having a flower girl and ring bearer allows you to include some of your nieces, nephews, or other children with whom you have a particularly close relationship in the ceremony. You can even choose several young attendants if you so choose. Typically, these little attendants range between four and eight years old so the key with selecting their attire  is to consider their comfort and maturity. When asking their parents about having them in your wedding, make sure that you point out whether you are offering to buy them attire as a gift  or if the parents must purchase it themselves. If you are trying to keep your bridal party small, then you probably won't want to include them.

As mentioned, the attire (and shoes ) should be as comfortable as possible. Try to choose outfits that the child is happy to wear so that they won't be inclined to tug on them or try to take them off. Also, make sure that the fabric is not itchy. The cute-factor is certainly diminished when the flower girls scratches her way down the aisle instead of tossing petals.  When it comes to style, choose accordingly.

  • Age Matters -- Older kids will probably be happy to dress up in fancy dresses  and mini tuxedos.  Most girls at this age are very willing to dress up like princesses. For smaller kids, you might need to shorten and simplify dresses (so that they don't trip) and give boys Eton jackets  and short pants. For girls who are picky about wearing dresses, don't hesitate to offer them a pants option that is just as fancy as a mini gown.
  • Wedding Formality -- There's a big difference between a flowergirl dress  and a simple Sunday dress,  so consider how fancy you really need a child to dress. Is a tux  absolutely necessary or will it just cause discomfort and cost the parents a lot of money on something he'll never wear again?
  • Date and Location -- If the event will be outdoors, don't forget that grass can stain. Keep shoes of a dark color if possible and keep pants and skirts hemmed high enough to stay clean. There's nothing like buying fancy kid's clothes  to have them last just one wearing. Also, if you're having a summer wedding, you'll need attire that is lightweight and breathable. Consider shorts and short sleeves, or linen suits  for boys and for girls, sleeveless  silk  or cotton frocks  and sundresses.  In winter, let girls get glammed up in velvet  or taffeta.  Also make sure that they have tights  in winter to keep little legs warm.
  • Matching the Bride and Bridal Party -- You may want the flower girl to match the bride or the bridesmaids, but while black has become a popular option for bridesmaids, it can look too severe on young girls. Another option is to let her wear white, but with a few colorful accents (like a sash ) that match the wedding party. There is not right or wrong way to do it. Other than the color, the style, even if made to match, is usually designed with a high neck or plenty of coverage to suit a little girl just right.
  • Wearability -- In all instances, always try your best to select something for the kids that they might be able to wear again. This may not be an issue for some parents, but for others it's considerate to keep their financial situation in mind. Kids outgrow clothing fast enough as it is. 

Start Shopping

Here are the major brands that make flowergirl dresses.


Child Attendant Checklist

Choose a ring bearer pillow  that isn't too big for his small hands.

Flower girl baskets  are critical; don't forget to fill them with petals

A flower girl book  can help ease nervousness and makes a great gift.

Flower girl shoes  are usually white slipper or sandals. So cute!

A cuddly pal  can help snuggle away pre-aisle jitters.

Extra undies, just in case  -- always be prepared!

A beautiful wreath  is the perfect accessory for a flower girl.

The child's favorite snack  -- good for bribes and incentives

A change of clothes  for after the ceremony or party, or just in case.

Fake rings, for practice -- so that little fingers can get used to handing off the rings.

International Resources

For this resource in your home country, please see:
FR: Les enfants d'honneur